Wednesday, October 21, 2009

Maybe some procrastination

I definitely feel the end of this incarnation of Blog. I'm not quite ready to bring things to an end. I'm picking at Chapter 24, Saying Good-bye to Grief in Experiencing Grief by H. Norman Wright. I have many of the signs of moving forward and yet quite a few lingering grief related oddities.

Moving forwards: Reduced crying....very much so, want or able to help others in similar situation, eating, sleeping patterns returning to normal, not as tired, patient with self, discovering new personal growth.

Not quite there: concentration difficulties. I find this most annoying. Getting through worship without crying-I can't even begin to think when that might happen. I do it now but only with a lot of gritting of teeth, breathing, and sips of water.

As I look to closing* this blog I think I'm going to keep a new blog for moving forward and keep this open a bit for those lingering areas that the author says can take up to 2 years to fully resolve. I think I know who I want to talk to about books or studies to give myself a bit of structure. *The blog will stay up but won't be actively used.

Recommendations from the author in this chapter include eating well. Food may not taste good but eat anyway. Stay fueled to stay healthy. Exercise. It can reduce stress and provide a time and means for socializing. Rest and sleep. I'm finding that I still crave more sleep than I anticipate. I'm trying to get to bed earlier and honor those times when my body says, "Go to sleep right now!" A confusion about sleep is that I'm in a stage of life where I wake up more frequently-usually because I'm hot. sigh. I'm not sure what is lingering effects of grief and what is peri-menopause.

I can say with confidence that raw pain is very much gone. I have "grief attacks" but they are fewer, less intense, and I'm not as surprise by them. I can also say with confidence that I can and do live in the sure hope that Mom and other loved ones live at peace with my Lord and Savior Jesus, the Christ. I too will join them in eternal praise! Hallelujah

Some photos from this week:

Sunrise, on the way to work. Clouds courtesy Hurricane Rick

5:30 p.m. same day, Monday, I think, Looking east near work.

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